All couples fight. It’s perfectly normal to have conflict in any relationship, whether it’s romantic or not. Most of the time, as long as we navigate these situations in healthy ways it actually helps us better communicate and understand one another. But there are some things that can be extremely trivial that all couples fight about. And we often hear about them in online couples counselling sessions.
Sometimes, these can be small irritations that can build over time, ‘till someone explodes. Other times, they merely serve as the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. But for some inexplicable reason, there are a few things that seem to just rub everyone the wrong way. These are the silliest things every couple fights about:
That One Thing They Don’t Want to Let Go
It seems like there’s always that one item cherished by one and trying to get thrown out by the other. Whether it’s a favourite plush toy forever taking up space on the bed. An old university jersey that’s already in tatters. Or an odd-looking statuette that’s been in the family for generations. It’s the thing loved by one and absolutely hated by another. And that starts many an argument over where to put it and when it can be put in the bin.
Over or Under
This debate has yet to be settled despite many couples having attempted to do so throughout the years; which way to place the toilet paper. This has not only created a divide in many a household but between friends and family. For some strange reason, everyone has very strong feelings about whether toilet paper should come from the front or the back of the roll.
From Over or Under to None
This one is definitely an irk more prevalent under the ladies, and a far bigger challenge than the over or under debate. It’s the replacement of the toilet paper roll once it is finished. Anyone who has ever sat down on a toilet seat and noticed, too late, that there is no toilet paper left can understand the instant panic and fury that rages from within. Cue “one of our most epic fights”.
Cheating… with a Movie or Series
This is a modern phenomenon, but these new types of betrayals can lead to fights that can really escalate to almost cheating scandal levels. When there’s a movie both said they wanted to see, or a series that both watch together – finding out that the other has already watched it or continued watching without the other has become an unforgivable act.
Too Hot or Too Cold
This can be an endless struggle when the inner thermometer of one doesn’t align with the other. From indoor temperatures, and car heating to pools, and bedding, getting things just perfect to match both individuals can sometimes seem impossible, and can lead to arguments, especially when it feels like one is always left sweating bullets or the other is always left shivering.
Being Mean… in a Dream
This is probably the most funny, yet intriguing phenomenon. People actually get upset about something their partner did in their dreams. What makes this so interesting is that their feelings are 100% valid since they, technically, did experience whatever it was – even if it was just a dream.
In these instances, we usually recommend during online couples counselling that you acknowledge the feelings as well as the fact that it was not real – this opens up a dialogue where one can process and get rid of these negative emotions without unfairly taking it out on the other.
Cleaning up the Mess
Between doing the dishes and taking out the trash there seems to be an imaginary scorecard constantly being ticked off. And once the tally becomes too unbalanced, a row is bound to ensue.
Luckily, this is one of our easier silly arguments to solve during online couples counselling. Just go back to basics and dish out (pun intended) specific days each person is responsible for cleaning up the mess. Or just take turns, although we have found that some individuals’ memory can be problematic. In these instances, one should follow the guideline of rather being specific than sorry.
Tackling Take-out
Deciding what to get for takeout sometimes seems like a tougher task than trying to negotiate world peace. If one is in the mood for pizza, the other wants burgers. Or even worse; someone cannot decide what they’re in the mood for in the first place. Needless to say, this often results in frustration and fights.
Switching Off the Light
Whether you have bedside lamps or not, this seems to be an ever-present problem. Couples always seem to end up in bed together, realising that the main bedroom light is still on. And then who gets to be the designated light “killer”? This might be one of the most common complaints we hear during online couples counselling sessions, but, luckily, this is also one that is very easily sorted out with a variety of solutions.
“No, I’m Good”
There is one scenario that is almost guaranteed to unlock murderous urges. That is when one asks their significant other whether they want something from the store/the restaurant/etc. The significant other then responds with “No, I’m good”, only to dive into whatever their partner got the moment they get back home. But before you get featured on an episode of Snapped or start buying everything in twos (regardless of what your partner says), try some of the solutions we offer in online couples counselling.
Existing Too Loudly
This is another thing that comes up quite often in online couples counselling sessions and can sometimes take an interesting turn. Ever heard people complaining that someone “eats too loudly” or even “breaths too loudly”?
This is generally considered to be pretty excessive and rude in most scenarios, but did you know that this can actually allude to an underlying mental disorder? Being overly sensitive to sounds, or particular sounds is called Misophonia. Misophonia can be symptoms of Tourettes (remember, it’s a spectrum), OCD, and Anxiety Disorders.
Where to Go
If there’s one sure-fire way to test the resilience of any relationship it’s to have a couple go on a road trip. You learn a lot about your partner when they start getting lost, and need to figure out where they need to be going.
Do they stop and ask for directions? Do they listen to directions given, whether by you or a local? Or do they just blindly depend on the GPS? And what happens if the GPS loses signal? Things can go south between partners pretty quickly when you need to figure out where to go, and this is when you need to use some of the tools that we teach during online couples counselling.
What Comes First; the Milk or the Coffee?
This is not just an argument reserved for the sanctity of our own homes, but definitely, one that gets exacerbated by the kind gesture of a partner. The world is essentially split by those who either believe that there’s a distinct difference in taste if you pour the milk in first or after, and others who say that it’s all hogwash.
The majority of the time, everyone can manage to live in peace despite these grievances. But it’s that first taste, a scrunched-up nose, and someone asking “Did you pour the milk in first”? that can be enough to push someone over the edge. Or watching as your better half pours, almost in horrific slomo, the milk in before the coffee during breakfast time. They say no good deed goes unpunished, and this many a couple can attest to.
How to Fold the Laundry
If you ever have the time, just Google how to fold laundry. You’ll be shocked to find how many different methods there are. Now imagine these various imprinted methods getting married… One scrunches up their undies and tosses them in a cupboard, whilst the other neatly folds their delicates.
One folds their t-shirts front-facing, whilst the other just folds them in half. Whatever the preference, it’s almost like someone touching a landmine when they open their closet or cupboard door to find an item folded “incorrectly”. We have worked through many a disarming laundry fiasco during our online couples counselling sessions.
Making the Bed
The famous saying says that “you’ve made your bed, now sleep in it”, but there’s nothing about who needs to make the bed once you’ve finished sleeping in it. This seems to be a detrimental flaw in the English language when it comes to couples. With two people sharing a bed, who decides which one makes the bed again in the morning?
Luckily this one also has a pretty easy solution when everyone gets up at the same time – simply take turns or allocate dedicated days to each person. But what happens if one needs to always leave super early for work? Or one travels a lot and only sleep at home on certain days of the week? We’ve seen all sorts of unique situations where the same question gets brought up; who makes the bed? We’ll help you find a custom solution during online couples counselling.
If you have a few of these silly wrinkles souring your relationship, just schedule an online couples counselling session where we will iron out these wrinkles in an easy and fun way. You can reach out to us via our Personal Online Therapy website, or by sending a mail to info@personalonlinetherapy.com. Alternatively, you can simply complete the form below, and we’ll get back to you as soon as possible:
